Does this thing still work? I hope so. Anyway, I’ve got some insider information for you. But don’t worry. You can share it with anyone you want. This isn’t the SEC and I won’t Martha Stewart you. I’ve got a new blog. If you’re bored, curious, click-happy or suffer from any other feeling that makes [...]
Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category
hello?
Posted in Uncategorized on January 11, 2010 | 4 Comments »
hiatus suspended maybe not really
Posted in Uncategorized on December 2, 2009 | 33 Comments »
Hi, kids. How’ve you been? Good. And your cousin? The one with the thing? Good good. Glad that healed up for her. It’s been a bit; 13 days, actually, since I packed my bags and set off to see the Wizard. Guess what: I’m still in the waiting room at the Wizard’s office. Apparently, there [...]
off to see the Wizard
Posted in Uncategorized on November 19, 2009 | 22 Comments »
The figments of my imagination have been withering, lately. Maybe it’s that I haven’t been watering them enough. That definitely seems better than the alternatives — that there’s been some major climatic change I’ve ignored or that their soil (played in this analogy by My Right Brain) has become infertile and harsh. Or maybe I’m [...]
our promise to you
Posted in animals, evil-doers unite, tagged animal cruelty, because when everybody thought somebody would do something nobody did anything on November 17, 2009 | 30 Comments »
You, I bet it doesn’t make you feel good. I bet you don’t even care enough to notice. I bet you’ve simply become accustomed to the comfort of cruelty. It’s easy, right? It’s just a dog. It’s just a dog. Plus, you don’t have to go out of your way. All you have to do [...]
the one where i put words in your mouth
Posted in Uncategorized on November 12, 2009 | 21 Comments »
[Note: for purposes of this conversation, you should imagine my voice sounds like the bass dude from a mid-90s R&B boy band]1 *ringring* you (collectively): hehroh? [Wait; stop. Cut post. I forgot to mention I imagine you say "hello" like Scooby-Doo. Okay. Let's start this from the top.] *ringring* you: hehroh? me: hey. it’s Effbee. [...]
10 things you’d hate about me
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged something kinda sorta sounds like Aaron Neville in there, these are my confessions on November 10, 2009 | 27 Comments »
Last week, Carissa so so generously tagged me as an Honest Scrap. Wait. Am I using “scrap” correctly? Can I be one? Or is it just like a shield of honesty that I hold? I don’t know. Let’s assume anything is possible. I tweaked the rules a little and went with ten honest things that [...]
some twist images like fun house mirrors
Posted in ranting and raving, tagged i don't like you, Land of the Lost, Renegade on November 5, 2009 | 18 Comments »
It’s not what we are; it’s what we appear to be. This is our currency. This is what we exchange. I don’t get to see whatever it is you actually are. I don’t even really get to see the you you wear by design. None of that has anything to do with my eyes. I’m [...]
don’t turn your back on chickens when your pop rocks taste like butter
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged California Raisins, coming soon to greeting cards near you, proverbs, stream of foolishness on October 21, 2009 | 14 Comments »
Please don’t think too hard about that title; unless you’re laughing and can imagine Charlie quoting it as Article 9, Sec. 12, clause 4 of Bird Law or something. Then, by all means, snicker away. Your laughs, for me, are like peanuts to a hippo (the undisputed elephant of the river). The only point behind [...]
to pleat or not to pleat
Posted in Uncategorized on September 17, 2009 | 25 Comments »
It’s not really that much of a question. It has been decided for us. The answer is “to not.” Or “not to.” Whatever. It’s early. Moving right along. Upon getting home from happy hour last night, forgetting there were still important hours left in the day and promptly falling asleep at a time way too [...]
a not so novel idea
Posted in Uncategorized on September 8, 2009 | 16 Comments »
So I’m writing a novel. No, not really. I lie for a hobby. I’d love to be a novelist. But remember what Mrs. Lieberman wrote in my progress report in 3rd grade: I take pride in a job well done. So I wouldn’t want to just write a book. I’d want to be the next [...]
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the Change I Wish to See is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
