You could rank the anticipation of it somewhere between the second-coming and The Return of Jafar.
That’s right. The movie.
I’m sure you’ve heard about it by now. I’m sure you have at least a dozen reasons why this movie should not be made. I have a baker’s dozen. But like I warned, this is not about Facebook. This is about the movie.
So far, Columbia Pictures had its screenplay — courtesy of Aaron Sorkin — and its director — David Fincher. But now, ladies and gentlemen, we are starting to see the formation of a cast.
The “film” is going to be based on the social network-founding trinity: Mark Zuckerberg, Eduardo Saverin and Sean Parker. In order, the actors who will play those roles:
Jesse Eisenberg
Andrew Garfield
Justin Timberlake
Yes, you read that correctly. Justin Timberlake. Bringer-back of sexy, serenader of señoritas and Emmy-winning SNL skit performer.
I’m not lying. Read for yourself, if you must. Variety.com doesn’t fail.
Now, look: Justin’s a pretty talented dude. I don’t want to get on his bad side because, like Scarlett Johansson learned, what goes around comes back around. And, honestly, every time you ask yourself¹ whether an NSYNC member should have extended pop’s stranglehold on the charts by becoming so successful at a solo career, remember that it could have been JC Chasez rather than Justin. And imagine if you had to see JC Chasez on your TV multiple times a week.
Exactly.
But the real point is that they’ve taken a less-appealing-by-the-day social platform, made a movie about it and chosen arguably one of the top 5 stars in the world to be one of its featured actors. There’s no way this doesn’t become an absolute spectacle. And I don’t even mean the hype around the movie. I mean the movie itself.
How so?
An example: let’s say you go see this movie (drunk; you and some friends each downed a pitcher before heading in). You’re about 40 minutes in and JT says something about “poking” or how he’d “post it up, up against the wall.” At that point, you know you might as well just leave because you’re not going to make it to the end anyway. You’ll stumble out into the hallway, laughing hysterically and you won’t even want your money back because you haven’t laughed that hard in a while (totally worth 10 bucks). You’ll pull out your phone, tweet about it and head to a bar where the bunch of you can continue wondering why anyone would let this movie happen.
__________________
¹And I know you do.
I’m waiting for “Twitter: The Movie” …
… 140 characters … for ADD/ADHD addled minds!
Haha. That would be the choppiest movie ever.
I have no words. No words at all. Facebook movie? I mean, why?
They seriously can’t come up with ANY good story lines anymore?!
I think the answer to your last question is “No.”
What Marie said. If they want a decent story, I have at least one for them. Maybe two.
I think you probably wrote better stuff on your hand with a pen when you were in grade school.
This can’t really be happening. I mean, I trust you, but…wtf?
Oh, it’s happening. And woot! for being trustworthy.
I’m only going if Andy Samberg’s making an appearance. A musical one. Because that will truly mark the beginning of the end of our civilization.
And I’ll laugh all the way to hell.
If Andy Samberg doesn’t have a cameo, this movie is going to be as sad as I expect it to be.
So we’re getting drunk and going to see it right?
I gotta think about this one. It’d have to be a show without all the 13 year olds who actually want to see it.
Oh man.
In. Deed.
And Aaron Sorkin is involved in this??!! Aaron, I ask you—How could you go from “Sports Night” and “West Wing” brilliance to a Facebook movie featuring JT??
I’m laughing at this post, but the reality behind it is wholly disheartening.
I wondered the same thing. I guess the dialogue could be brillia– No. No. Can’t finish that.
What time do we tag up for the pitchers?
Am I the only one who thinks JT is not sexy? I’m not arguing the talent but seeing him sing he’s bringing sexy back is laughable. Good song, but I don’t need to see him deliver it.
High noon. And all I know is that a whole lot of people want what he’s… giving.
Oh. My. God. And I don’t even believe in God. This is disturbing in so many levels. FB, the movie. Why? Why?
Haha: “And I don’t even believe in God.”
Why is there a movie about Facebook in development? That’s like making a movie about the internet… oh wait a minute…
Right. A “high-quality” example.
I feel the need to defend JC. Like you’ve just picked on my little brother or something. Not that I’ve bought any of his solo stuff or pay him any attention, but I guess I’m an NSYNC fan girl for life.
I can’t comment on the movie because I’m too busy laughing at your “up, up against the wall” reference.
AND I CANT BELIEVE THERE’S SOMEONE DEFENDING JC CHAZ-ASSHOLE!!
do you watch him on america’s best dance crews? he is a douchemacockle.
I think the most important part of this is that you just said you watch America’s Best Dance Crew.