… ended with Neil Patrick Harris presenting me the Emmy for Outstanding Guest Actor in a Drama Series for my brief stint on Mad Men. Not only had I broken the color line on Madison Avenue in the episode in which I starred, but I also managed to be in the same room as Christina Hendricks and remember how to use my words.
And the latter, my friends, is a pretty brilliant performance.
Miss Bianca and I considered hopping a private jet Paul Rudd offered to take us to the awards, but we changed our minds at the last moment. As it turns out, we’re the basis for NBC’s blockbuster Heroes. I often believe too readily in the kindness of others but can do pretty much any and everything, like Peter Petrelli. Miss Bianca, much like Brea Grant — aka Daphne — runs like the speed of light and likes to “permanently borrow” the belongings of others. So I flew us out there and, when we paused in Colorado so I could rest, she stole us some Wendy’s.
But before we flew out for the celebration on Sunday, Miss Bianca and I put our elite carpenter skills to good use. We built a full-scale replica of Noah’s ark.¹ With winter DC’s rain season right around the corner, and expected indefinite delays on Metro because time is not — how you say? — “of the essence” to the Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority, we knew we were going to have to get creative with ideas for how to get to work on time on rainy mornings.
That’s the recap of what I imagined.
Sure: I could tell you we went grocery shopping or that we stopped by the local hardware store so that we could put up some pot racks. I could tell you that other than that, we never really left the house; that instead we watched Tropic Thunder Friday night and actually didn’t even watch the Emmys Sunday because we were cleaning the kitchen and watching the game.
Sure: I could have written that post. But… why?
I respect two kinds of flight: of the Conchords and of fancy. I enjoy the former and employ the latter.
_________
¹Don’t ask where we got the blueprints. We’ll never tell.
Wise words, man. Wise words.
Hmmm my weekend consisted of performing in the emmy’s, u watched right? what can I say? It’s a busy day of a big time artist, ofcourse jamming there with The Roots made all the difference. QuestLove was sick, yes? Then it’s all night making more tracks with Primo, daaamnnn he’s a beast. I spent the next day flying to Bahamas though, my fiancee Jonathan ( Rhys-Meyers ) happened to plan a surprise later on. Maybe he’d propose? Holy shiz, I hope he ordered it from Harry Winston.
HAHAHAHA
Too much?
So much better than being sick at home and eating too many cookies.
Quest: the hardest working man in music. Damn, that would’ve been awesome. Hope you feel better, though.
I like this game.
Rachel McAdams and I spent a lazy weekend hanging out in the Pacific Northwest. We went biking, hiking, strayed into the occasional bookstore looking for some original editions of Steinbeck and Vonnegut, and stayed at a nice B&B (we got along splendidly with the wonderfully nice couple that owned the place). We’ll definitely be going back – we’re thinking maybe early November?
Then we hung out with NPH on Sunday afternoon after rehearsal and before the show. So nice! So witty! I made great jokes and NPH and I are pretty much bffs now. Rachel was impressed with how well NPH and I got along. Neil, his bf, Rachel, and I were all thinking of trying to get together every couple of months.
Or, you know, I watched a lot of TV.
Next time you’re all out, gimme a call. I make great jokes, too.
I call dibs on John Hamm in this delightful little world.
And so you shall have.
One place I wouldn’t visit in any fantasy world: Grey Gardens. There’s some freaky shit going on in that place…
I thought Jessica Lange’s skin was going to snap off during her acceptance speech. Tooo….much…..Botox….
Didn’t see the remake because I saw the original and that was just disturbing. Whoa.
YOU are basis for Heroes?! SWEET!!!
It’s true. It’s true. I figured we’d announce it today before the season premiere.
I totally missed the Emmy’s. I didn’t even know they were on. I feel like I’ve been lacking in the tv watching arena. I blame it on reality shows taking over.
Your imagined version sounds fabulous!
Thanks. It was the best I could do. I was really at a loss for a post idea.
I didn’t watch the Emmy’s so I’m going to watch some highlights at work.
Haha. Naturally. Best place to catch up on tv is at work.
an active imagination is more vital to your health than an immune system. at least in my mind. also, pot racks? i desparately want to put up a window box in our new place but fear tis too close to the rainy season/winter to invest in planting.
Yeah. It might be too close. But it’s never too late for pot racks.
Oh. And you are spot on about imaginations.
You got invited to the Emmy’s too? Nice…
I saw you there. You don’t remember?
I watched the end of the Emmys. But I like the description of your imagined weekend much better than anything I did.
Dallas was playing the Giants in Texas, so that came first. But it sounds like I didn’t miss too much.
I TRIED watching the Emmy’s. But other than when Justin Timberlake went up to Tina Fey during her acceptance speech and said, “YO TINA, HANG ON I’MMA LET YOU FINISH BUT…. uh.. I .. umm.. well actually? I’m just gonna let you finish.” The whole thing was rather boring.
I’mma go find that on the Tube right now.
Flights of fancy are wonderful. More people should employ them.
I could go for a daydream right about now…
A daydream. I needed one all day.
I missed the Emmys too as I am allergic to awards shows.
I also have one more flight for you. Flights of wine at a classy joint.
Anything with booze has got to be included.
i, uh, was sort of unaware of the emmys. i was busy watching the giants win, anyway. plus, i’m positive your version of the events was far superior to actually WATCHING them..
I want to be Christina Hendricks.
Or be on her. Whatever.
Also, if I’m going to be Christina Hendricks I’d like to hook up with Harry Crane, because for some reason I’m kid of into more than Draper and Sterling lately. He was so pretty in the office as the guy crushing on pam last season.
I kindof wish that Neil Patrick Harris was not gay because I would fuck his dorky little face off until he said “LEGEND (WAITFORIT) DARY!”
Yes I did.
Maybe he’s a, uh, switch-hitter? Maybe you’ve still got a chance.