Yesterday began week number two at the new job.¹
It has meant a lot of readjusting; and no, I don’t mean the pocket pool kind. Get a hold of yourself.
Mostly, it has meant that I’ve only really gotten a chance to read blogs and reply to comments when I get home. It has also meant, though, that my email-response time is on a serious lag. While sifting through all of the emails I hadn’t read from last week — past the Facebook alerts; and past the email about penis size and monkeys — I realized that I have reneged on a civic duty.
I was supposed to tell you what you’re doing this Friday night. It’s this:
If you’re wondering, “By ‘this,’ do you mean replicating that pose or just going to the happy hour?” my answer to you is: drink more and wonder less.
If you’re asking, “Why did you say ‘what you’re doing’ and not ‘you’re invited?’” my answer to you is also simple: you ask too many questions for someone who does not have a choice in the matter.²
And, finally, if you’re asking why I’m only giving you four days notice rather than the week I was supposed to, well, I don’t really believe in evaluating my own mistakes. Those who study the past are doomed to know about it and, frankly, I don’t want to know about it. This blog is not the time-traveling phone booth from Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure; it only moves forward.
But, since I know a bunch of you have already learned what you’re doing on Friday from other le-gen-dar-y sources, I’m sure my coercion has been for naught and you want something else. Well, here’s a Daily Show clip that still makes me laugh six years after it aired. If you don’t laugh, rather than me saying something crazy like “You don’t know funny,” I challenge you. Find me something funnier.
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¹KimwithaK: are we living parallel lives? It’s the same time-line for you, too, right?
²This applies to long distances. I have it on good authority that Falkor, the luckdragon from The NeverEnding Story is available for cross-country and international flights to DC.
I’ve totally failed my civic duty for this as well.
But I am focusing on getting better and trying to get my tonsils to go back to normal size so I can actually party it up full force on Friday.
Feel better. Though I gotta admit: when I was first reading this comment, for some reason I read “tonsils” as “toenails” and I couldn’t, for the life of me, figure out why they weren’t at normal size and why that meant no drinking.
I need to learn more about this new job man! I also need to see your face. I wish I was in DC for this.
I know. It’s been a minute. I’ve been under a rock, especially with the move, too.
I wish I was there to attend that, I wanna see who lost their pants and who made dance videos and such.
Well, that kind of footage just might find its way to the internet anyway.
i’m jealous of you DC bloggers!
There aren’t any big drunken blogger fests near you?
I am officially pouting.
Someone (read: Lilu or Q) need to show me their tits before I have a full on fucking tantrum.
Officially pouting? Falkor really is available. I think you just have to fall asleep while reading a book in an attic, or click your heels three times, or something, and he’s there.
Wish I could be there.
Me too. Be cool to meet you.
Does this event apply to bloggers on a hiatus for an unknown amount of time?
Of, course it does. And since I’m writing this reply so late, I’ll make sure I email you to let you know that.
If PQ has abnormally large Toenails she should probably stay home. I don’t want anyone to get injured.
I also have an eagle available to transport people. They should probably wear some kind of armor, but other than that it’s a solid ride.
See that everyone? Between an eagle and Falkor, there is plenty of transportation. But right: wear protection.
Sighhh. I want to come. How about all you awesome DC bloggers get your asses up to Boston?! Yes, that sounds like an excellent plan!
I am overdue for a trip to Boston…
“Drink more and wonder less.”
I think that’s an excellent motto. I can totally see it on a t-shirt.
(Also, I failed to post about it, too. Thanks for picking up my slack.)
I have always wanted to make my own t-shirts. But I never remember why… Like, I always forget the stuff I think is funny and want to put on them.
Dude, I can say with 100% certainty, I will see you there!
DC is so ready for you. So ready.
People need to stop with the questions and just go to the HH.
Sorry I’ll miss it though. I’ll be out of town. Enjoy! (Which I know you all will.)
You’ll be missed. But something tells me there’ll be a next time…
You get emails about monkeys? I so envy you.
And seeing Colbert lose it is priceless!
Isn’t it? He’s always in control. Except, apparently, when enjoying a banana.
Hrmph. There are no drunken blogger Happy Hours around here. Although, I did get laid out of my last “meet up.” Sadly, it did not last. Again. Hrmph, I say!
Yeah! getting laid. That’s a super-bonus. Boo! to it fading, though.
god, i have seriously got to make a decision about friday. i, uh, may see you there. or i’ll be in nj. it’s 50/50 right now.
This may seem obvious, coming from me, but I actually can’t fault you for being split on whether to choose Jersey. It’s JERSEY.
OMG WE ARE LIVING PARALLEL LIVES. That means we’ll both get our eventual book deal at or near the same time. :
Are you a virgo? I wonder what miracle of modern astrology explains this phenomenon.
I’m a scorpio. But there’s definitely something going on here. Must get to the bottom of it.
And P.S. I wish I were in the same area as you guys to join you at the blogger meetup.
You know what we need? We need someone to actually invent teleportation or at least give us virtual reality or something. This whole not being able to be in two places at once thing is so 20th century.
I will be wearing a tiara, mardi gras beads, and an ironic t shirt.
I shan’t be hard to find…
If you don’t actually show up in a tiara now…
[...] All of my DC Blogger friends are holding a happy hour tonight at Evolve 1817 at 7 PM. For anybody that actually reads my personal blog, you know they are a good time. [...]