In a pre-Facebook world, a 10 year-old boy finds a capsule holding nine items and a perfectly-folded** letter…
— —
dear Me,
1.
Learn to play this. Now. Do it. Do it. You know how unrighteously you sucked at the violin. And though you’ll be nice with that trumpet for years to come, learn this. Now. You heard me.
2.
Forgive yourself more than you think you should. Start slow and get used to it. This is an apology card. Use it as often as needed.
3.
Go see Mrs. Doubtfire. It will break you into a thousand pieces. You’ll cry openly in the theater because watching a bitter divorce on screen will mirror your life too closely to bear. And you will wonder why your true story hasn’t had a happy ending yet. But you haven’t cried about the divorce yet. And it’s been two years. It’s time to admit there are chinks in your armor.
4.
There’s this girl… She won’t be the one. And neither will the next one… And that’s ok. Leave your disappointment in this journal and let it be.
5. Never be surprised by how strong you are. The day you expect anything less is the day you get it. There’s no item for this one. That I’m writing you this letter is proof enough.
6.
In high school, they will vote you “most likely to succeed.” You will be shocked that that many people even know you exist. You will want to add this to your then-growing list of ideals to live up to. But you don’t have to be their success. You have to be yours. And that’s allowed to be anything you want it to be. But since I know how stubborn you are, here’s $100. Start a savings account, now. All those years of school are going to bleed you dry.
7.
photo credit: the thirdrat
Be overwhelmed by the magnitude of the little things. They are everywhere. Do not ignore them. Do not step on them. Do not brush them aside. I’ll get you started. For instance, you’ll love these things. Never forget how to use one.
8.
You will worry at what moments you should be the big brother and at what moments you should play more of a father role. You’ll be scared. But don’t ever recess into this fear and be neither. Be both, if you can, but never be neither. Look at this picture: you are much of why he makes it this far.
9. 
Eat some vegetables. These have been freeze-dried so they wouldn’t be a festering mess by the time you opened this. I wanted to make sure we were perfectly clear that I didn’t mean broccoli swimming in cheese, but you don’t have to eat these. You just better eat some. Daily.
10. 
This is an iPhone. They play music and videos and you can get on the internet without all that damn modem whistling and it’s a PHONE. Stay your ass in science class and find a way to invent more of these. You are officially the coolest human being alive.
All the best,
You (+ a beard and some seriously needed height)
— —
*Thanks to Twenty Something Writers for the prompt.
**What? I have OCD and know a little origami.
Very good advise for the younger FB. I would throw in:
11) Everything you do is experience, good or bad. Don’t dwell on the past, just remember the lesson.
I think I left that one out because he wouldn’t believe it if I told him.
I love the approach you took. And I think #5 is great advice, at pretty much any point in one’s life.
I’m probably going to reading this list a lot.
#2 and #5 hit pretty close to home.
Also, #9? I’ve tried those. NOT my fave.
The veggies? They look gross. Were you camping?
It is never too late to pick up the guitar. Three chords. Three! And then you can play at least a quarter of every song out there; G-C-D.
Great list.
Never too late. I’m a few years in now. I finally got started in 2003. But I could be 16 years in.
“Forgive, and ye shall be forgiven.” Now, try as I might, I cannot find a loophole in that. It does not say, “Forgive everyone, unless they’ve said something rude about your child.” And it doesn’t even say, “Just try.” It says, If you want to be forgiven, if you want to experience that kind of love, you have to forgive everyone in your life—everyone, even the very worst boyfriend you ever had—even, for God’s sake, yourself. – Anne Lamott
It’s so hard. But the alternative isn’t livable.
Oh, fb, I love Love Love this. Even I can’t leave a snarky comment to this one. You are such a beautiful writer and you make this world better by sharing your gift with us. xoxo
Well I’m just gonna have to thank you in person for a comment like that. Have you ever been to Buffalo Billiards?
I like how you used pictures. Great idea!
Thank you. I’m a little addicted to media. There are probably so few posts on this blog without either a picture or video.
I want to learn to play the guitar SO BADLY!!!
It’s so easy, well at least to get started. Do you have at least 6 fingers?
i like your list form letter! And wear sunscreen! (haha, that’s what this reminded me of..) “But you don’t have to be their success. You have to be yours. And that’s allowed to be anything you want it to be.” So very true and well said!!
thanks for visiting my submission. i like your blog and will mostly be back around.
Thanks for stopping by. And sunscreen… That’s a great throwback. I haven’t heard that in years.
We are on the same page today, my dear. Love this. I was just thinking last night how I wish I hadn’t quit piano…
I have wanted to learn the piano for so long.
HA! The violin was MADE for unrighteous suckage.
I love this list!
Re: No. 3 – I didn’t cry about my parents’ divorce (when I was 7) until my dad announced he was getting remarried to the woman for whom he left my mom. My little brother and I bawled and bawled. My dad wanted to talk it out, but we told him we were crying because our stomachs hurt. Which was probably the truth.
But I didn’t cry at Mrs. Doubtfire because by then both my parents were more-happily remarried, and I realized that splitting up was the kindest thing they ever did for us. At least now my brother and I know what a happy family looks like and that it is possible. We wouldn’t have had any model of that if they had stayed together.
I think not having the model makes me hesitate today. But we also tried to disguise the tears. I mean, what do you say?
Thanks for checking out my blog! I agree. The iPhone is essential. I wish I had this a few years ago. lol
It would’ve been life-changing. Having the iPhone in, say, 2001 even? Life-changing.
stricken lifestyle or mindset, but rather it is a way of setting priorities in life. Meaning
I loved your letter. It was incredibly awesome, and I could more than relate to the Mrs. Doubtfire bit. I STILL cry over that movie due to the striking similarities of things I was going through.
It was just too real for so many kids dealing with a divorce. Just too real.
I just did the writing prompt as well. I was inspired by yours. :]
That is so flattering. Headed to check it out… now.
I could use a list like this. Maybe I should have written one years ago. Maybe I should write one now. I’m still working on me.
Always working, I hope. Because I fear the day I feel the work is done.
I love that you wrote about the iPhone. With all the 3.0 coverage today, I wish I had started working toward being able to develop iPhone apps 6 months ago when I first looked into. Also wish I had stuck with math/science and learning computer programming when I was a kid.
I was drooling over the 3.0 coverage today. To be ahead of this curve? Almost unthinkable.
GREAT LIST. Forget Mrs. Doubtfire. This list made me cry.
Oh it totally got me. It was like therapy in my kitchen last night.
What an awesome letter. You couldn’t be more right about Mrs. Doubtfire. Damn that movie.
Ugh. I don’t think I could ever watch it again. One and done.
I’d add one… Learn to receive what others want to give you, not only to give to others, but to receive from others, and to ask from others.
What you wrote is beautiful f.B… Your posts always leave me thinking, analyzing and learning.
That is a huge one; a great one. That I need to learn. Thank you.
I know… I need to learn that too. It is what my mom, who is a great friend and very wise, keeps repeating me, that I need to learn to let others help me and take care of me. I am glad you knew exactly what I meant. Hugs. And thank you.
I’ll give you pointers on playing guitar if you promise to post your progress!
Why the hell didn’t I ever get one of these? (though my mom taught me how to make hash brownies- does that kinda count? Sort of home ec-ish)
I have actually never made hash brownies. Curious…